Dishing Out: Revenge Stories Best Served Cold

Meditation isn’t for everyone. The texts are short but unclear. The examples are unrealistic. Try them out for a day and you’ll seem out of character. And if there is meaning within the universe, it didn’t take justice into account. Sometimes you’ve just got to take matters into your own hands. Be like water. If there is anything we can agree on, revenge demands flexibility. These heroes did that, and they found a way to level the field and triumph in time. These revenge stories will make you bawl, laugh to your heart’s content, or even make you feel bad for the people who were victimized. In the end, it’s all about how you react to the situation and these people were just at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Wrap It Up

Nothing is more fun than having fun housemates! They keep your days alive and give you amazing memories. And prank wars are super fun, right? Well, maybe only to some. This girl went away for summer and when she came back, her entire room was filled to the brim with pink balloons!

Now, she decided to repay the favor. Come Christmas, she planned the best gift there is. Your own stuff! She wrapped up every single thing in her housemates room. We wonder how long that took. As if blowing up those balloons hadn’t required enough dedication!

Cash Your Paybacks

Marriage isn’t always a walk in the park. It takes time, effort, compromise, and a whole lot of communication. So one would hope that the marriage will last forever! Sadly, we’re seeing a lot of divorce cases and the rate of divorce has gone up tenfold in the past 50 years.

This guy was one of those people. So, he has to pay alimony but he just couldn’t let bygones be bygones without having a bit of nasty fun. He decided to customize his checks by adding in an image of him and his new wife. Ouch.

All Wrapped Up In Revenge

This wife was probably heartbroken when she found out her husband was cheating. But she picked herself right up and planned the perfect revenge plot. Now, she probably decided she didn’t want to damage anything but just annoy the hell out of him.

She covered his entire car with so many layers of saran wrap that she probably bought out an entire store. Either way, that cheating man will find it hard to get into his car unlike how hard it will be for him to enter his wife’s heart again.

Messing With the Pack

Whoever said humans were the best of the mammalian species were dead wrong. Never claim rightful territory by kicking a dog. It will find its way to level with you. Dogs frequently show they have a keen understanding of discerning right from wrong.

That dent is quite the beauty. He even had his friends to help him gang up against the bully. Given how shiny the driver keeps his car, those scratches the dogs caused are surely going to drive him up the wall. It’s the least they could do.

House Guest

Don’t you just hate it when your neighbor doesn’t get that you want to be alone? She will not only intrude but spread lies and malice about the most basic things any human does. It can get really old really quickly.

Yes, we have a pile of laundry; our dog barks; the baby cries. But hey, who said hospitality can’t go hand in hand with humor. Would you like that lemonade served cold? Hope you are able to pick up on those delicate hints of a secret flavor!

Easter Egg Hunt

Another cheating fiasco. When will cheaters learn that they will never get out unscathed? Well, this guy better get ready because his (ex) girlfriend has found out that he’s been a cheating scum and has prepared a list that will send him on a wild goose chase.

She hid all his things around the town that had been significant to their relationship. Two scenarios could probably result from this little prank. One, being he doesn’t remember these places and two, someone will probably steal his stuff before he gets to them.

I’ll Give You What You Want

Anyone who’s ever been in any sort of relationship, whether it is just your friend or a romantic partner, you know the first answer to this question: What would you like to eat? Know what’s irritating? Leaving everyone guessing all the time.

This guy was one of the many who finally got fed up with having to ask his girlfriend what she wanted only for her to respond with “I Don’t Know”. So he decided to give exactly what she asked for. It’s an I Don’t Know Salad!

Enough Is Enough

Having a messy partner takes a toll on a person. Asking nicely turns to passive aggressive sentences which then turns to nagging. And no one likes to nag or to be nagged at. For this guy, his partner kept leaving the house without making the bed.

That meant he had to do it all the time. Finally, he had enough and decided that he was only going to do his side of the bed from now on. We feel you, it’s downright unfair and tiring to be the only picking up after things.

Sibling Rivalry

Siblings are wonderful! They add color and plenty of love to our lives and make us feel less lonely. However, anyone who has had siblings knows how annoying they can get as well. This pair of siblings totally get what we mean.

This brother thought it was wise to use his sister’s toothbrush as a shoe shiner. Well, he thought wrong. She got revenge by giving his shoe a special glow that he was looking for. Safe to say, the look on his face shows that this is the start of a revenge war.

Hung to Dry

This sneaky method of taking revenge is commendable. If you keep on picking up after your partner, the very least you could have him do is to bring in the laundry. That sun is at peak position to deliver the candid message.

This unforgettable and hilarious image is sure to be imprinted on his mind, and trousers forever. This is preparation for all the years of domestication. Now, you’re home free! Hopefully he reads between the lines and starts shaping up his sordid ways.

Cheaters Never Win

Love is great. Your partner is someone you think you can trust until you realize that it was a terrible mistake — more than ever when they cheat. Was anything ever real? Well, this girl decided to make one thing of her cheating partner real and made sure it was there forever.

She convinced her cheating boyfriend they had to get matching tattoos and while he went first, she picked up her stuff and left. That’s a perfect way to ensure he’s slapped with a tattoo that will forever remind him that he’s a cheater.

Got Milk?

Having a new baby is hard enough without hassle of having to pump for half the day. You’re always racing to the ladies or mothers room to express milk to nourish your baby and then you realize that the one place you can store it is the office fridge!

Well, this breastfeeding mom has had enough of some weirdo constantly taking her breast milk, so she finally put a note on the bottle. We hope that person has learned their lesson! However, that was one of the healthiest milks they were consuming.

Revenge Of The Zip-Tie

A driver’s licence is something a lot of people have but not everyone deserves. Parking however, is something everyone should learn how to do properly because if you don’t, a lot of people are going to get mad and you never know who might take revenge.

This driver decided to park in a rather selfish manner and paid the ultimate price. Clearly, some other driver decided he or she needed to get revenge by using a zip-tie to link the trolley to the person’s door handle.

Trick Or Prick

October has arrived and it’s time for autumn and Halloween, which means pumpkin picking season is out to play and everyone is excited to carve their pumpkins and display them on the front porch! Of course, not everyone generally decorates their jack o’ lanterns quite like this.

However, this also means that there are sticky fingers running around as well and we don’t mean kids with fingers coated in candy. This guy was so miffed at someone stealing his pumpkin that he planned a little trick for his own treat. Good luck to whoever it is that has been stealing from him!

Boy, Bye!

Breakups are not fun for anyone. And if you’re the one who messed up, you probably would’ve spent quite a bit of time wondering how to fix it. Well, we believe this couple had broken up and the guy decided to try his hand at a penned apology letter.

The lady, however, was not going to accept his letter. But she was gracious enough to correct his writing and even put in tips and a score. At 61/100, we think she was being generous. At the bottom she gave her feedback saying there was room for improvement.

You Snooze, You Lose

This wife was so very tired of her husband snoring. Perhaps it was keeping her up all night. Either way, she believed she needed to do something for revenge. We don’t really understand what happened next, but first, she recorded her husband snoring.

Then, she went and posted the recording of him snoring on Spotify for the world to enjoy. In fact, she even did remixes. Is this for revenge or was she just realizing some trapped creative energy? Either way, it gained 20OK views. Wowza.

Wife=1, Husband=0

Husbands have a way with words but this husband needs to learn how to watch his. Perhaps he was joking, but it sure seems he wasn’t. Regardless, he called his wife a sandwich maker and of course, she brushed it off, flipped her head back and laughed. NOT.

She decided to show him exactly what kind of sandwich maker she was. We are sure he learnt his lesson and won’t be uttering those words to her. Imagine his face when he bit into that unwrapped slice of cheese!

Boxed In

Some people think that they are the king of the road in their average, stereo sedans. Do they know Bluetooth exists? They’re hoarding up all that space there…with those cassettes and CDs. And they couldn’t care less about how they treat their fellow drivers.

In what universe is it acceptable to park parallel to the curb stops? Even if he had parked first, justice will prevail. We’re all for that team effort there. It’s a good thing to see that camaraderie is alive and well amongst townsfolk.

Claws Out

This feline decided to take matters in her own hands. Her co-worker had been eating her lunch and failed to read the signs that it was a take-out for one. Did he really think he would get away with it so easily?

Felines sharpen their claws regularly. Hell, she probably opened that can with a paw! We heard it tastes just like tuna though. At least she put in cheese. We advise her to maybe improve that taco with a few mice next time — gives a Ratatouille taste!

Queue Off!

What is it with grocery lines that are so unbearable? You’re stuck in the same place with strangers and you wish you could control how fast they carry out the process. And there’s several things that make it worse: first, those displays that add to your pile of “necessities”. What’s a budget anyway?

Second, it’s that misaligned wheel that screeches of death and destruction. Third, it’s that passive-aggressive lady who “accidentally” bumps your rear with the end of her cart. But this lady had a particularly snide partner in line — and found a fantastic way to use her time wisely.

Trick Doughnut

Having a pantry in an office has its perks and downsides. The perks are that you can store your food so you can binge while working. Downside here is that people may make a mess, take up too much space or worse: Steal Your Food.

This person has had it with whoever it is that has been stealing their food and decided to set a trap! He got a few tempting plain doughnuts and stuffed them with mustard. If that isn’t vengeful, we don’t know what is.

Drawing the Line

It must be that some people’s field of vision is blocked by the car’s interior or make-up. They can’t seem to park properly. That is a meager few inches and that driver would have been able to take up one car space.

No worries, we will adjust the car space for you. That’s just what this vigilante did when he stored a box of chalks in his car…for 10 months. Today was that much-awaited day! In all that time, he could have become a part of the local police and given that guy a ticket!

Slashing Tires

Best believe this guy has had his fill with his next-door neighbor. He has probably gone to their backyard, had an amiable chat, discussed political affairs, kissed butt, and made sure that the nuke button stayed intact, then went home.

This time, he left a note and slashed the tires. We don’t like it any more than you men! Seems like what they’ve got here is nothing short of…failure to communicate! We know. You were probably shocked that people could go to such lengths all while playing head-banging guitar riffs.

Slithering Sneakers

Those heels place pressure in all the wrong places. We’re wearing mandatory company clothes, ones that were sewn too tightly, and we come home to men who spend all day playing video games. How much more lucky could we possibly get?

So to pass the time, it’s good that this woman diverted her partner’s attention to where it matters. Now he’ll learn to stop leaving his shoes all over the place. Had it been us, we would have bagged him with that pet. Guess being cold-blooded is in season!

Artistry

If Michelangelo had the Catholic Church to snide about, and Bieber has Gomez to tweet about, then this artist had an anonymous fan to respond to comically. She took some time out of her schedule to properly prepare her winning response.

On the other hand, this well-drawn symbol of defiance should also go out to individuals who mock and undermine artists. Just because it’s art, or on Spotify, doesn’t mean that it can be demanded free. After all, they have stomachs to feed!

Who’s the Boss?

When adopting a pet, evaluate your personality styleץ Are you the sadist or the masochist? Are you dominant or the submissive? Because when you are the latter for both questions, you are better off with a dog on a leash, or several if you want to get paid.

Cats are politicians. They know things but have no regard for them. They have no regard for personal space, boundaries or titles. Take for example this woman. She had locked that cat in the bathroom because it was time for springtime cleaning, and for taking out the cat litter. Surprise, surprise!

Rinse and Shine

It’s only your household when you’re sitting on the throne. That mounting glory is pooled behind you. And you have dutiful servants available at a bidding, so roll out the scroll of paper. Until you see that the enemy has exhausted your resources.

If you hear the trike’s tires squeal and a wide-grinned madman pedal towards you, at least you have great taste in American horror films. If only you had looked around ahead of time before plonking yourself down on the ivory throne!

Running the Estate

The only true royalty in the family is the matriarch herself, the absolute queen of her domain. This grandma knows it. She’s going to live for another century if she has to just to prove a point. But as she does so, she’s spending as she chooses.

Got greedy relatives? No problem for this matriarch. She knows precisely how to nip the problem in the bud. Those kids had better learn their values if they ever want to come over her house and have a cookie — let alone a hug!

Sibling Rivalry

If the stereotype is correct, then middle children have a penchant for being true sociopaths. Just look at this one here. This seems like the kind of sibling too tell you you’re adopted, and that the stork met a hurricane during delivery.

Having to deal with your older sibling’s hand-me-downs was degrading because she clearly did not have fashion taste. But sure, scribble away, because in an alternate universe, you were lavished with attention and time. Temporary markers may fade, but permanent ones can’t rectify what ought to have been all along.

Potty Trainer

It’s portable for a reason. Those dual engines should help you move further just to allow the crane to pass through. But you wouldn’t have any of it. You had to use the porta-potty. Karma is not on your side on this one.

He has got the crane. Crane trumps potty every time. If it were us, we would have you reek on hours with the discharge. We would probably rattle it too and have gravity work in our favor. We can always clean it later.

Coloring Within The Lines

This is the most savage trick to play on someone who’s being a parking hog. It seems harmless, but every word you read further delivers a dawning sense of insult. How does the old saying go? Kill ’em with kindness! This friendly message packs a savage punch.

There is nothing redeeming about having the intellect and motor skills of an adult, but having the impulses of a toddler. Say it again for the bozos in the back: learn to park within the lines! Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, revenge is too!

Exchange Gift

Jolly old St. Nick has come to town and he has come bearing some rather unconventional and outright aggravating gifts. This victim received a gift duct-taped all around. Talk about awkwardly unwrapping an actual brick before those other family members.

This Christmas gifter levels the field by giving his brother a hammer and a concrete gift box. We would have probably given him a set of concrete boxes, decreasing in size placed one inside of another. The smallest box is a paperweight with “Thor” on it.

Pineapples on Pizza

A similarly horrific counterpart would be raisins in chocolate cookies. But Rad Tasia goes berserk sociopath-style. There is no standard, no victim that cannot fall prey to her seeming act of generosity. She will open that carton box angled towards you. Crumbs gather at the edge and you take a bite, to taste the soft and melty cookie.

That is until you take the whole bite. Now you are just repulsed. Maybe it was a mistake. Some people cook with a spoonful of salt too much. And as you finish the whole batch, you are sure that your friend is un-raisin-able, to begin with.

Graphic

We all have different ways we’re programmed to absorb information. Some people are textual learners while some learn best through visual aids. That’s just what that infographic was for: to assist those cheeky bathroom users who had messed it up for everyone. Unfortunately, this drew the ire of a regular.

He must be a kinesthetic learner for having pieced that together. That took a great deal of sheer will. All that holding, expelling, and release, just to have the pin exit at the end. There really should be a time limit.

Man Against Wild

Primal instinct kicked in. From his peripheral field of vision, a pair of wings extended and adducted until claws snatched his ice cream cone. His finger had been cut. He had to retreat. He reached for weaponry underneath the sink, locked and loaded it.

The aggressor proudly struts across the railings. He settled his gaze at its chest and pulled the trigger. A continuous stream of correction shot through, causing the bird to lose its balance. The next time that comes over, it won’t be for a volley of water, but it’ll be for entrée on a searing skillet pan, with spice and salt to taste!

Miss Americana

Blue, wide-eyed, and tall. To her, your words were like knives and weapons wounding her over and over. You knocked her off her feet and got her feeling like a nothing. Truly, indeed, it would seem you picked on the weaker man.

This woman had had enough of her man’s antics, and needed to find a way to get through to him at last. Someday, she’ll be living in a big, old city. And the cycle of rudeness ends now because she won’t be led down that road. Why you gotta be so mean?

Purge

You have until sundown before the siren blares. You are only allowed level 1-2 weaponry, so you choose to employ martial arts. You flex your hamstrings, leverage, then kick at the child’s bike. You did it before the legal purge. You were warned, and it’s set in stone.

Those Venetian blinds will not hide you. He can see right through and he’s on a hunt. This will only end one way- with a lollipop in his hand and a glass of milk by the tabletop. Have him cradled by your babysitter. This is the only way you will be spared.

Service Charge

Was it because you were a male, or because your clothes weren’t skimpy enough? Either way, that bartender with a whole lot of attitude could have done better. He could have served those mixes and catered to his clientele in order of arrival.

This is the perfect way to pull the master shake. It will bring a delicate flavor to your revenge. That’s aesthetically delivered. Have him rub that table dry with those well-earned bills. This is an excellent puzzle for him to try and decipher.

Peter Rabbit

Rascal. Rebel. Rabbit. This is a replay of Potter’s classic. He was quietly hopping away on the lawn. As he neared the hole, he kept those jumps shorter, and the thumps quieter. He will be sneaking in your vegetable garden only to be met by four plastic walls of Tupperware.

The moral lesson of the classic is to listen to those wiser in judgment. Never make the mistake of stealing carrots in broad daylight. If you feel the urge, then nab them by sundown. Not everyone has night vision like you, Peter Rabbit.

Frenemies

You’re sporting the high school vibe when you simultaneously love and hate your “BFF”. You don’t understand how you guys became friends in the first place. There are times you reverberate the same wavelengths, especially when it comes to dissing others.

You love her enough to admire her sense of fashion, but you hate that she doesn’t floss, or that she doesn’t know the best angle of light exposure. You can’t tell her. How can you risk hurting her feelings? Just edit her out of it! That’s more like it. See how that picture is so much better with a solo subject. Flaunt it!

Hair-Pulling

It is more common to see two mean ladies in a fight pulling out each other’s weaves. This is similar to that. When he was sitting down (presumably, withouthis legs spread too wide), she walked past him and hit his leg.

He respectfully brought it to her attention, just to solicit an apology, but she wasn’t having any of that. She hurled a comeback. Now those braids gave him an idea. We hope he was a good boy scout and did a decent figure 8.

Cheater

Mosh pits, searingly loud rock bands: the thought of seeing all these just fills us with euphoria. So it’s really no wonder why thousands flock to enjoy music with everyone else. A group of strangers with few to much in common, gyrating, stomping and bonding over guitar riffs and unexpected news.

Of course, given that there were so many people gathered in one place, a woman scorned saw it as a unique opportunity. That guy must have been a cheat. Well, at least the truth has set her free, and she has amassed the sympathy of the whole crowd.

Siblings

Who said you could adopt a new one? Why has the neighborhood peasant come to visit? She is of an inferior class. See those paws, they’re smaller and less defined. They’re unsharpened from having to rummage through trash rather than test the integrity of sofa legs.

She has poor muscle tone; she doesn’t know how to defend her queendom. And that color! That color is just despicable. Only the golden browns can be called feline royalty. There, we’ve quarantined the bumpkin. Off you go! Surely the prisoner will submit shortly.

Grounded

Back in our time, things had been simpler. If we weren’t doing as we were told, our mothers would simply unplug the cord and Mario would indefinitely lose his life. No mushrooms to jump over or tunnels to dig through; the ultimate big boss has claimed him.

And all for the sake of cleanliness. So we’ll hurriedly toss the laundry aside, vacuum the room and sweep all of the dust under the rug, along with our homework. It seems that when those fidget spinners were the fad, this mother grew tired of her child’s excuses. No cord-unplugging, just weights!

Grow a Pair

How much does a bottle of water cost? Surely, that’s quite a lot cheaper than the risk of incurring hepatitis. We don’t understand how anyone would have mustered stealing something as common as that. Why take something that’s so easily obtained otherwise?

If he doesn’t have a pair of cojones, then at least he will maybe grow a pair of breasts. And just in case the thief is a woman, we wouldn’t mind going over our desk and complimenting her for such sudden improvement. Breast tenderness? Here, have a bottle. Might as well take the whole rack.

Hairy Situation

What is our list of turn-ons? Hair in all the right places, and in the right amount; good hygiene; and initiative. Top all of this off with a wicked sense of humor, and we’re absolutely smitten. Here’s a winner! He seems to have it all!

That took a great deal of artistry, arranging strands like that, and having to make sure that they’re stuck with the correct proportion of soap and water. The next time your roommate fails to unclog the drain, you can always use acid.

To Whom It Belongs

This bum thought he would be able to get away with the vile act of improperly disposing of his trash. He drove miles to the middle of nowhere and unloaded a dump. Luckily, a Good Samaritan took pity and returned the trash where it properly belonged.

How lovely, he surely must have been missing that trash! Would you have been patient enough to do the same, ripping apart bag after bag just to find a home address on a mailing envelope? Well, it did make the list, and it will make a good story with friends.

Smart is the New Sexy

They have the new shades: transition but out of season. Those backs are strong and unyielding; they are used to carrying loads of books and can cite the references by the page. And some students, beyond that, have a sharper wit than we’ll ever know.

There is a reason why we don’t mess with them. Behind that façade of awkwardness, are a dozen of insults that can go straight to the plexus. And they have such high standards. How does a teacher regain control of the classroom after that?

Snuffing the Fire

Here’s a confession from a happily-divorced woman. We hope that she had gotten a good portion of the alimony. Either way, it’s clear she’s the victor. Just to secure the fort, we would have drunk the milk supply and stored away yogurt in case he needed to extinguish the flames.

She could have also “conveniently” cleaned the refrigerator and taken out all the products and ice packs. As a harbinger of truth, that ice pick had better be the first thing he glances at the tabletop. He’s never going to live this one down.

Closure

Some respectable people have it, while some people have at it. Quick! Choose your weapons: her cooking, your unclipped feet, her fake tan, your beer belly, her ex, your Netflix password? If you opt for the latter, you will be entering a brave new world of exacting revenge.

We can only be generous and loving for so long. But once that relationship is over, to each his own! He probably should get his password changed or use his friend’s Netflix. It’s time she unsubscribed, or he could have spoiled the plot for her.